Another day at the office passed by, and everything seems to end well. Except for a little bit of a bad news. Since our team is consistently on top, it’s expected that eyes are on us, watching our every move, waiting for us to make mistakes and for sure will attribute those mistakes to pathetic excuses on why we’re always on the upper quartile. Well I must say we work so damn hard for whatever successes we’re enjoying. Sometimes I can understand why people tend to find faults on others so they can make excuses for the mistakes that they did, thereby hindering their progress. It’s just human nature to aim to reach the finish line first. Who doesn’t? It’s the survival of the fittest, the weak gets eliminated. But it’s different when someone you know and you thought you trust betrays you. Or maybe that person is just doing her/his job. It’s one of those nagging cliches, “nothing personal”. Urgh! Sometimes I don’t like hearing it when I’m on the losing end haha. I remember Niccolo Machiavelli’s the end justifies the means. It’s more of an extreme way of saying that you gotta do whatever you gotta do to get what you want. But does it really apply to all cases? Do you have to sacrifice friendship, loyalty of your peers and respect just to have your way up on the corporate ladder? Sure you’re just doing your job but up to what extent? Nobody is indespensable. Those very people whom you so patronizingly kiss asses might be the very ones who’ll throw you out without thinking twice if they found no use on you anymore. Sometimes I wonder if the end really justifies the means. After all, it’s always the end result that matters, no matter how the process was done. But I also remember, we’re still humans, whose emotions can be part of our judgment, whose judgments can be subject to personal biases. Respect of your peers is earned. You can’t just demand respect or expect to give it to you just because you’re superior than them. Just try to see where they’re coming from, try to be tolerant a little bit and try to see the good side out of every bad situation. After all they’re just ordinary people trying to make a living. And no matter how they earn it, I guess it justifies their means. Besides let’s not become hypocritical, let’s not be judgmental nor biased. I’m sure one time or the other, we did something unconventional, something that’s way beyond the normal protocol so we can have things our own way. I guess after all, sometimes the end justifies the means, but not all the time, not in all cases.
Whew, I’m back to blogging again after 5 months of writing hiatus haha. I woke up this morning feeling giddy. I don’t know why, maybe because I got 12 hours of sleep again. I feel like I was deprived of sleep these days that whenever there’s an opportunity for me to grab a nap, I maximize the experience — meaning it’s just not your average “nap”, it can stretch up to hours of lounging on my bed haha. Well, I checked my team’s stats — it’s just normal for me these days to do so, not that I’m stats crazy, it’s just that I wanna know how the team is faring. Then I saw my passing audit, w00t~. Then I checked my new schedule, another wow — start time at 10:30 am. Tsk. This can be too good to be true so please someone pinch me hekhek. Most people will think a 10:30 am shift is no big deal. But I need to remind you guys I work in a contact center. Having a graveyard shift is the worst thing you can get. Been there done that, and I don’t wanna have that schedule again. So having a mid-day shift is heaven. It’s a bliss. This is one of those times when I felt like rumpletiltskin dancing gleefully around a bonfire. There are occasions when the earth seems to rotate properly on its axis, that the universe seems to connive in giving you what you need, that happiness seems so real that it can be scary at times when there is so much to celebrate. What do you do when everything seems surreal? Do you pinch your own self? Slap yourself like a crazed idiot, just like in the movies? Well, when you’re happy, let it flow within you. Let it vibrate through your senses and savor every moment of it. Sometimes we’re so used to hardships that when we’re happy, we get paranoid. We tend to think that there might be something bad that’s gonna happen, like an aftershock. Well paranoia will get you nowhere. Happiness for me can be a state of mind. If you’re happy then wallow on it while it lasts. There’s no use fighting happiness. Real happiness is knowing you have done good and the universe is giving you a good karma. Just give in to it. It’s an emotion so rare these days. Stop worrying about the consequences afterwards. Just be happy, happy. Just like what I read in a novel, happiness is everything. Or is it?
I saw some episodes lately of one of reality talent shows and I was struck by the unabashed display of talent, guts and well — stupidity. There are those who really have what it takes to be a “star”. And there are those who in the process become laughing-stocks of the public. I don’t get it really when it’s clear that people don’t have an iota of talent in their poor selves and yet they have the nerve to flaunt about their own “uniqueness”. Walking like a street moron is considered modelling, dancing 2 steps out of a 70s tune is considered a talented dancing, an English declamation with a Filipino pronunciation is a talent, acting like a crazed idiot is the “in” thing. Omg and omg again. These people consider these skills as their innate talent which the whole world should witness. Oftentimes we find them funny. But I find them most of the time moronic. Who in his right mind would appear in a national television, in the perusal of the judges and the public, talk trash and declare it as talented acting? Tsk. Sometimes I wonder if these people are aware that they’re just making a fool of themselves. I wonder if they are just plain desperate, something that they so desperately wanted to accomplish but were denied of the opportunity. And I guess now is the opportunity so they grabbed it. Or maybe they belong to those set of individuals who like claiming attention in whatever way they could.
Sometimes whenever I think of the cliche “you can never get what you want so deal with it”, I just smile. And oftentimes I ask myself, should I stop then and there if that situation arises? If I can’t have what I wanted, should I just give up? Should I try till the last shred of hope in me falters? Then I remembered a good friend of mine whose life never fails to amaze me. She has lupos, a disease which eats up your immune system until such time that your anti-bodies are the ones causing your organs to malfunction. Even though she was diagnosed with this deadly disease, still she showed a great zest for life. And I told myself, how is it possible to live life normally when all your hopes seem to crash on you? How do we deal with life’s disappointment? Do we throw tantrums? Do we sulk around in the corner? Do we lose faith? Or do we treat them as blessings in disguise? There are things that we won’t normaly do when life is ok, when life seems to be on our side. But how about when odds seem to be against you? Whenever I’m confronted with disappointments, I just close my eyes and try to think clearly so I can make a good decision. It’s of no use to mull around the problem until you become absorbed by it. I must admit that there are things in life that we have no control of. But do we stop there? NO. We’ll just have to try harder, try to be better and learn from the lessons of our disappointment. More importantly I try not to affect the people around me nor blame them for whatever misfortune that I encountered. It’s how I turn around the experience that matters. It doesn’t mean that you fail that you can’t move forward. There’s always this idea of getting up and continuing the journey, in case you haven’t heard of it haha. Life will always have a way to disappoint us, from not being able to eat what we crave, to not being able to accomplish what we intend to. It’s one of those elements that spice life up. Well then so what? We might also have forgotten, life is also about moving on — moving on from mistakes and moving forward to furthering ourselves to be better.
I was just chatting with my friends in Facebook when the idea of writing this struck me. They were kind of a bit emotional when the talk about their past relationships is in discussion. It made me think hard. Do we really ever let go of someone who has been a part of us? And if we are able to manage to do so, then how? It might have been 1, 2, 3 years since you broke up with your gf/bf but have you really moved on? The familiar things that you both used to do, the familiar places that you both went to. The way he/she laughs, talks, gets excited, flips her hair, purses her lips when in deep thought, narrows his eyes when he’s mad. Are all of these keep on coming back to you? Are you able to exorcise the thought of what might have been if the two of you are still together? Sometimes we tend to hold on to our past, to the point that we are living in our past already. Unknowingly, we do things that we are accustomed to. Unconsciously our thoughts drift back to those days when things are ok, when life is ideal, when you can brave whatever storm in life because you are with your supposedly soulmate. But now you wonder what went wrong? The dreaded thing happened to you. You saw this happened to your friends but not with you? Were you caught off guard? As I think of my past love, I can just smile and think of the good things. Reminiscing is good but don’t dwell on it too much. Just learn from your past, and live with the present. But is it really that simple? We can say on the surface that we’re ok, that we moved on already, that life is fabulous, that we’re doing spectacularly. But are we really? How can we say we’ve moved on already when all we can think about is our previous relationhip? That everytime we have a chance to a new love, all we do is compare it with our previous one. That we make our past relationships as some sort of gauge, a standard where we have to impose on ourselves. Is there really a timeframe for moving on? Is there such thing as a graceful exit when it comes to failed relationships? For me, acceptance is a key to letting go of that lost love. Just be honest with yourself. If there’s really no chance to patch things up, then don’t make yourself believe that everything is ok, that you can still weather it. You have all the right to shed as much tears as you can, to wallow in the pain. But don’t wallow too much. Life is so beautiful to spend your lifetime feeling the pain of your past. You have the whole world ahead of you, waiting with open arms for you to explore. No matter how cliche it might sound but it’s true, the only way you can set yourself free is to let your past go and let it stay in the past.
Hope is what keeps us going. Hope is that beckoning light at the end of a dark tunnel. No matter how dim the prospect is, no matter how gloomy our day is, we still strive to move forward, strive for the better because at the end of the day we know everything is going to be alright. I knew some people who seemed to be ok at the surface but deep inside are struggling, because they feel that it’s the end of the road for them. What they failed to realize is that there’s always a detour. If one road closes on you, there’s always that alternate route. If we fail in a particular endeavour, it’s because maybe it’s not really meant for us or there’s something better waiting for us. I remembered vividly when my father died, I was just 16. I have 3 younger brothers and my mum used to work as an OFW so we were left with no choice but to bear the burden of living without our parents or else we’re gonna end up in the streets if our mother didn’t go back to Singapore. Hope kept us going. We knew we’re gonna get there, we’re gonna cross the bridge and arrive at a greener side of the field. And thank God we did. I always make it a point to be positive everyday. I always make myself believe that whatever circumstances that are happening in my life, it’s because they happen for a reason. It’s my life and I’m the driver of it. I steer the wheel of my fate. And that’s what I always keep on telling my family and friends, don’t blame others for what you failed to achieve. Just believe in yourself, hope for the better. There are those who brave the far flung areas in search of a faith healer, hoping to be healed from an illness. There are those who never fail to bet on a lottery–everyday, in the hopes of winning millions of pesos and in the end alleviating them from poverty. Those who never dared to love again, hoping that their lost loved ones will find their away again back to their welcoming arms. Hope is what’s left for us when everyone seems to abandon us, when opportunities seem to elude us, when everything seems to turn upside down. What’s gonna happen to us if hope is taken from us? Shall we cease to exist? Just a thought…
When you are at the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on. – Franklin D. Roosevelt
Career Life-Personal Life-Family life-Social Life. I often wondered if it’s possible to have all of them. They say you can’t have the best of both worlds, but can you atleast have a portion of these worlds? How is it possible to have a successful career, a good relationship, a supportive family and friends whom you can go out with and enjoy? Can we balance all of these without compromising one from the other? I used to think that we can. But hey this is the real world. We’re not in the movies where we can be whoever we wanna be. I’m not being pessimistic, I’m just trying to live life the way it’s supposed to be. There’s always what we call prioritizing one from the other. Well maybe it depends on each of us, how we perceive life. It’s how we define success really. If you feel successful just by being a plain housewife, rasing you kids spectacularly, well you are indeed successful. If you think you are a successful mediator because you’re always at the forefront of your friends’s issues, always being in the middle and in the end you make their lives better, then you are successful. You may be on top of your career but you feel empty, hollow, that something is missing, and when someone asks you, “are you happy?” Then you answered a resounding NO, then maybe you should start thinking about your priorities. I always make it a point to live my life one day at a time, focus on one goal at a time. It would be difficult to try doing several things in one stride and end up achieving nothing. I would rather be the best in one thing than be the best in nothing. Well if you ask me if I’m happy, the answer is a resounding YES. My career is not the high-strung but I’m doing well, I have a supportive family, and I have friends whom I can rely on when I need company. Well I think I got some portions of life’s shower of blessings. Some things I can be thankful for. Well, how bout you? *winks*
My brother just came home from a hospital because his girlfriend has dengue. It’s a dangerous disease brought about by a specific species of mosquitoes. Earlier today I also found out that 2 of my co-workers were admitted to hospital. If only I could do something but I guess their doctors will do everything they can so that my friends will be alright. Then I wondered how it feels like to be an immediate family member of these people, how it feels like when you see someone very close to you is facing a grave danger, something that they can even lose a battle between life and death. Will you be traumatized? And comes paranoia. Voices in your head telling you the worst. Of course we don’t want something bad to happen on our loved ones, but if it did happen, then what? Do we go on self-pity? Do we blame ourselves for something that we can’t control of? I guess it’s just one of those life cycles, we get sick sometimes but what’s important is the care of our family. There’s always hope, something that we can look forward to at the end of this ordeal. We can only give and take as much as we can. We can only make the most out of every situation. We might not be able to personally carry on the task of healing them but atleast we can make them feel that they have all the reasons in the world to survive. We can heal their emotions and psyche. Our body has its amazing way of fighting for life, of battling the impossible. Let’s just be optimistic. After all miracles can happen. Keep on being positive.
I work in a call center for about 3 years now and during that period, I only get to work in the morning shift for 1 week, the rest was in graveyard shift. I kind of got used to it already and I no longer feel stressed nor tired due to the schedule. Normally when it’s my rest day, I tried my damnest not to doze off when I get back home so I can sleep during the nighttime– the so-called “normal hours” of sleeping. But alas sleep came over me and I lost the battle at around 5 pm. I thought it was just a short nap but when I woke up, it was already past midnight! So much for my resolve of not sleeping during the day tsk. It just occurred to me, why do we insist of doing things during the “normal hours”? Why do we eat lunch at 12 noon? Breakfast at 8 am? Why do we have to sleep during nighttime? Can we call lunch those meals which are taken at 2 am (which is just normal for call center agents)? Or can we say “have a goodnight sleep” to our friends who just ended their shifts at 7 am? I guess these all boil down to every individual. If you wanna take your lunch at 3 pm then go ahead, no one is gonna stop you. Nowadays, the world is getting more and more dynamic. Things change so quickly, in a blink of an eye. Even traditions are altered, so we can adapt to the steadily evolving cultures. So the next time someone invites you to have breakfast at 1 in the morning, don’t raise an eyebrow, it’s just how the world is coping to changes. Be open for more possibilities. So “normal hours” for me are those times you spend taking good care of yourself, that means getting enough sleep (it doesn’t matter what time of the day it is), and nourishing yourself properly– be it breakfast at4 am or lunch at8 pm. Well who cares? Hahaha
Drunkard — one who is habitually drunk. I often wonder if I belong to that category. I don’t habitually drink though but when I do, I can’t help myself drinking a lot. It was really in college when I started drinking — almost everyday (thanks to my friends lolz). I had a friend who can’t sleep at all if he hasn’t consumed any amount of alcohol. It’s in his system already. And so I was hooked as well. Beer is like a perfume to my soul, the smell and taste of it make me relax and at peace with the world. I especially enjoy the drinking session when I’m with my friends or with people that I’m comfortable talking to just about anything under the sun. Well who wants to have a company whom you can’t even relate to? It will just make you all the more drunk, trust me. I’m a bit picky on places that I hung out with though. I’m not one of those whom you can find on the side of the road, carrying bottles of beer and wasting their lives away hahaha. I don’t prefer rowdy places as well. A subdued atmosphere will do for me. I often categorize the reasons why people get drunk. There are those who just enjoy the experience of getting drunk, those who do it just for the heck of it, those who want attention –people who always create a scene when the alcohol goes up in their peasize brain, those who want to just simply drown their sorrows –people who get emotional after drinking, those who want to forget and be forgotten even for just an hour or two, those who could not function properly if their body is not induced by alcohol…on which category do you belong?
